Super Awesome Dating

The term “pickup artists” to me is just a cool way of saying womanizer. Every guy wants to be a ladies man: a handsome, strong, charming man that all the women would die to have.  That desire to be a ladies man sometimes gets mixed up with the idea of being a pickup artist. A ladies man is not a pickup artist, and a pickup artist is not a ladies man. A pickup artist is a con man and a womanizer who plays on female emotions to manipulate  them.

I started this site because I was tired of all the junk information out their on all those other junk websites. I decided to call this site Super Awesome Dating to poke fun at the lameness of the other sites and their lame names (think seduction love diary chronicles journey). I wanted to create  something culturally relevant for today’s dating world that mixed personal development, dating and relationship advice, life skills, and humor to help you become your higher self. To become your best, so you can attract the best. To have a fun fulfilling relationship and find love and happiness. So please, I am sincerely asking you to kill the belief that being called a pickup artist is a good thing; and that striving to be as such is a good life goal.

Pickup Artists are Con Artists which make them a type of Sexual Predator

Sexual predator sounds a bit harsh and dirty but preying on women and manipulating them just for sex and eventually hurting them is what makes them a predator.  What two (or three, or four) consensual adults do behind closed doors is fine as long as it is consensual, but when one side is tricking the other, then it stops being consensual. Tricking a woman into thinking your someone she can trust and who cares about her when really your only looking to get in her pants results in you hurting her. You end up making her feel used and abused. Leaving her to decry publicly that your a player/playboy/womanizer/jerk in an effort for her to save face for being duped and dumped by you. Read More…

A guy crosses the line of creepyness. He makes the journey from stranger to boyfriend to ex to stalker. This weeks question:

I dated this guy for a year and a half. He was very controlling and very insecure. He would always accuse me of cheating. I never cheated, but I got so sick and tired of being called a whore and a liar that I ended it. It has been 3 months and he still calls me almost every day. Sometimes 10 times a day. Why?

Because he is crazy. Sorry I know that is not the nicest, most politically correct or philosophical answer, but I think it best describes his behavior. This behavior he is showing is an EXTREME form of persistence that most men demonstrate towards women at one time or another. I say extreme because it is a normal behavior for most men to be persistent and aggressive when pursuing  a woman. Remember, when a man  locks in,  he locks in. That is, their is no nice or right way to tell a guy to back off or that you are not interested. Their will always be men who operate on the boarder of your relationship.  I know this from my experience being in relationships with physically beautiful women. The constant texting, Facebook messaging, instant messaging is all very annoying. They know she has a boyfriend (me) but they don’t care. It is a silly game that is played, put that is how it is.

However, he crossed the line though. Three months and he still calls aggressively? He has not only crossed the line of creepyness, he has jumped it and is now on a 3 mile dash to the finish. This is not normal behavior. You should be concerned for your safety rather than simply wondering why he does what he does. Take stalking seriously. Here are some steps you should take: Read More…

Do yourself a favor and kill your online dating profile once you commit to someone. Why do you need to have a profile on a dating site if your someones boyfriend or girlfriend? This whole “not single, not looking” business is a bit silly to me and I think I understand the motives behind it, but I still think it is silly. Correct me if you disagree, but I believe the motives are: 1) Keep it as a backup plan just in case things don’t workout and 2) Not being able to make that mental transition from being single, to being in a relationship and 3) Being to lazy to create a new profile if you delete your old one.

Social media is certainly a proverbial monkey wrench in the art of dating, finding love, and being happy. Sites like Facebook with some 300,000,000 million users (no joke, that’s a crazy number isn’t it?) allows us to connect in very new ways, but it also keeps us connected when it might be best to just let go and move on. Our relationships are so intertwined because of social media that it is difficult to cut the cord (think facestalk). This mentality sometimes lends itself in a bad way with online dating. Since online dating sites are a type of social media, but not necessarily a social network. Read More…

Lets talk about interpersonal relationships and how they work. Interpersonal simply means your relationship with other people. Could be romantic (which is the theme of this site of course) could be friendship, or could be business among other things.  We all have a variety of interpersonal relationships just by being alive; and the one thing I have come to understand is that the relationships you have with other people is also the same relationship you have with yourself. Wait, what? Let me say that again, the relationship you have with other people is also the relationship you have with yourself. They are one in the same. Seriously. This might not make sense to you so let me explain.

You attract what you project so it should be no surprise then that the way you see yourself is the way the world will come to see you. You CAN NOT be something that is not congruent with who you are or how you see yourself. That means, its all in your head. Say your significantly overweight. You have a negative image of yourself and low self esteem and you generally don’t like yourself. You want to lose the weight, but you just think that it is impossible. Thoughts that race through your head. Perhaps something like this: diets never work, I’m just naturally big, I could never lose the weight, I’m fat and I’m always going to be fat. The relationship you have with yourself is a negative one. You see yourself as a worthless person because of your weight. You feel insecure and unattractive. No one could ever like you right? No surprise that the relationship you have with yourself is reflective of those with other people. How could someone else like you if you do not like yourself? It comes down to mindset, how you see yourself, your relationship with yourself, that has some of the most powerful influence on your relationships with other people. To give another example of mindset, lets talk about exercise. What if I took the mind out of this guy: Read More…

When does needing space turn into breaking up? That’s the theme of this weeks question. Honestly if your dating someone and they tell you they need space, or they need a “break”, it means their breaking up with you. Not sure why this is confusing to some. However, what makes this question a bit more interesting is that what if the person your seeing  just stops calling you? Yea, what if they do not officially break it off with you and just stop calling you. Here is the question:

I have been dating this guy for about  four months. We talked pretty much every day and saw each other regularly. At minimum every Friday or Saturday. We talked recently about how he likes his space. I told him that when he does not call or text me for days I don’t like it. It makes me feel insecure and I wonder what he is doing. Is that crazy? I don’t understand why it is such a big deal for him to call me for 5 minutes. I feel like I pushed him away.

Since we had our little talk on him needing space, he has completely disappeared. I have not heard from him at all. At what point do I move on? If I start dating other guys do I owe him anything? Like if I do date someone else should I tell him? I want to call him really bad, but I think it will come off as chasing him, what should I do?

The first thing you should do is read what I wrote on how to tell I a guy your seeing is your boyfriend. Men are simple and men will behave in a certain way if they have eyes for you. I’m sorry to say but it sounds like this guy is just not that into you. Read More…