Real men are ambitious men. It is as simple as that. Remember, Were simple creatures, and as long as you have that in mind, understanding why we do what we do will be much easier. More important than what we say, is what we are. The reality is that no matter if a man is a doctor, lawyer, CEO, or a scam artist, everything he does is filtered through that title, or rather, his status in society. The next part is how he achieved that status. For example, Gurbash Chalal built a 10 million dollar a year advertising company in two years by the time he was 18. The story on how a man achieved his goal is just as important as his current position in life. We all want that story that shows our scrappy, resoursefull nature to come from nothing and achieve something. The final part is how much cash we take home a year, the reward for our efforts. How much we make matters, but not in the sense so we can buy a lot of stuff, but more as a sense of pride. These three things: WHo he is, what he has done, and how much he makes, are the top priority of any ambitious man you meet. To the point where a man won’t feel like a man until he has accomplished what he desires most in life and feels complete and fulfilled in these areas. So, any ambitious men you date, or engaged to, or perhaps even married (not sure if any married persons read this blog) will be too busy to give you the attention you want and probobly deserve.
I write this from the heart because this happens to be my current situation. At 24 years old I had a good paying job and a girl that loved me, however I had a job I hated and was completly unfulfiled within that relationship. What I had always desired but never (untill a few years ago) had the courage was to be an entreprenur, to blaze a path of my own, to create something that can not be taken from: ie fired, downsized, layed off and so forth. And lastly to be in charge of my income and achieve the freedom I always dreamed of. Needless to say this drive resulted in the dissolution of many relationships with many good girls that any man would be lucky to have. Why? As I said, ambitous men won’t feel like a man untill he has achived his goal, he will be focused completly on his tasks set before him. This is me, and I am sure many other men out there. A man on a mission.
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Look at any boy. From the time a man is a boy, he is taught how to be a man. To be strong, stand up for himself, fight when need, get up and not cry. Compete, play sports, climb trees, scale rocks, be brave. A boy is taught to protect women and childeren, to look out for his siblings, and watch over the house. A boy is taught to work, get the groceries out of the car, take out the trash, look after the dog, shovel snow, and get a job as soon as he is old enough to. Finaly and most importantly, a boy is taught to make something of himself, to make his family proud, so when he shows up, everyone knows who he is, what he does, and admires how successfull he has made himself. This is all preparation for a boy on how to be a man.
Also, this does not change as a man gets older, it only amplifies the, “what am I going to do with my life”. This only becomes more and more important. Until a man is satisfied, you girls reading this will not fit into a mans life. If a man can not take care of himself, he is not thinking about the house and kids. Settling down is just not an option. Now I am not saying he need to be 30 or 40 years old till he is ready to settle down, but he has to be on his way to achieving his goals. Take a lawyer for example, once the guy who wants to be a lawyer is accepted to a good law school and knows exactly where he wants to end up in a few years, he is on his way to achieveing his goals.
This drive EVERY man has, it is the core of what is means to be a man. Wheather he is an astronaught, or a country music star, a mob boss, or a school teacher. Being able to take care of himself, his woman, provide for her, to protect his childeren, to give them what they need to succeed. This is what every man wants. Anything less is unacceptable, and is not what being a man is about.
Trying to learn the art of understanding men, first always boils down to understanding what drives them. If you want to understand the men in your life, and why they do what they do, then keep this in your head. First, men are simple. Second thing, do not project how you think or feel on to how we think or feel because the two have nothing in common; and third, men are linear in thinking (one thing at a time) and are naturally ambitious and competitive. Again very simple. Men are not too complex and we are all pretty similar in our thinking, and in what drives us. That is, 1) having our own life and identity, 2) doing something related to that identity, and 3) being compensated well enough for our efforts.
First part, our own life and identity: More important than what we say, is what we are. I don’t care if a man is a doctor, lawyer, CEO, security guard, player, pickup artist, or farmer, everything he does is filtered through that title, or rather, that status. Next is his identity related work: If a guy says he is a firefighter, the title along with related work to earn the title, in this example, is saving lives is critical. For example, Gurbash Chalal, a young man who built a 10 million dollar a year advertising company in two years by the time he was 18 is a self described serial entrepreneur and self made millionaire. Being able to say I am Gurbash Chalal and I am a self maid millionaire entrepreneur, OR I’m Jake and I am a firefighter who saves lives, is incredibly important in a man’s identity. Men do not want simply a title, they want to earn the recognition of that title. If they don’t genuinely earn the title, it feels meaningless. The final part to understanding men, is being fairly compensated for our efforts. We want to be able to take care of ourselves and a woman the way we want too.
How much we make matters, it allows us to buy cool toys to impress you and other men, but it is much more as a sense of pride and status. A way to show off, and take care of ourselves and others the way we want to. These three things: Identity, work, compensation, are the top priority of any man you meet. To the point where a man won’t feel like a man until he has accomplished, or is on his way to accomplishing that which he desires most in regards to his identity, work, and compensation. Then and only then will a man feel complete and fulfilled in these areas.
So, any man you date, or are engaged to, or perhaps even married (not sure if any married persons read this blog) he will be too busy to give you the attention you want and probably deserve, until he is satisfied with his identity, his work and his compensation for his efforts. These three things are integral for manliness.
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