Super Awesome Dating

Everyone, including myself, must learn the art of shutting the hell up. TMI, too much information, is a common problem when dating; or when entering any relationship for that matter in this modern world we live in. Sometimes we talk to much and say too much. We must teach ourselves when  to say what and when NOT to say anything. This takes time, practice, and a conscious understanding in your head of how what you say comes off to other people.

For example, have you ever been over taken by your passions with your lover, boyfriend, girlfriend, mistress, wife? For example, say that perhaps you decided that your going to break up or get a divorce. Tell the world as much, like your friends and family. Only to in the end stay together and reconcile? This is where STHU (shut the hell up) would have come in handy. Now your friends and family know your relationship troubles. Now it is a bit awkward for them to be around the two of you as they must pretend that everything is the way it was before you decided to end your long term relationship. Good one pal. Next time shut the hell up.

What about being pulled over by a cop?Many know this, some do not. When a cop asks you a question you give a direct response to the question that was ASKED and leaves no room for further inquiry. Also, ask the office questions. Like, “hello officer, what is the problem”. When he asks for your license and registration, give him your license and registration, don’t tell him where you were or where your going, UNLESS the officer asks you for that information. If it is a yes or no question, give a yes or no response. Were you drinking? Did you know you were speeding? Did you know your light was out. The best answer is usually NO, but if you were drinking, it’s best not to lie about that, since it will be pretty obvious if you indeed were.  For example, my friend got pulled over with me in the passenger seat. The officer asked if I was sober to drive if necessary. My response was yes I can drive. NOT “well I had a beer an hour ago so I should be fine”. That is  TMI, too much information. Just answer the question concisely and shut the hell up.

Meeting someone for the first time and telling your life story about how you were cheated on or have body issues or family issues or how you hate men or how every woman can’t be trustedis too much information. Consously think about how your coming off and what your projecting ( which negativity if you can’t put two and two together). When your meeting someone new for the first time, remember to STHU. Yes there is need to know information, like if you have a child, or if your a stripper or if your unemployed. That information comes after the first and second date, when both of you are seriously deciding if their is a potential relationship worth pursuing. If you spill the beans on your past relationships or issues you currently have with dating your going to turn off prospective matches. Your waving a big red “I’m going to suck the life out of you” flag. Remember to be upbeat and postive. Project the qualties men or women want. If you can’t do that, you shouldn’t be dating, you should be working on yourself first. Starting with, among other things, learning how to shut the hell up.

Telling your co workers about your dating problems. PLEASE, PLEASE, do not do this. When your distraught, feeling down about life, upset about something, work is not the place to share. Even if the people you confide in are your work buddies (guys) or work friends (girls) it is still not right. You will regret it later and feel a little embarrassed about it.  You need someone to talk to. Thats ok, talk to someone. You will feel better about your problem by connecting with other people on it. Just don’t do it at work. Call your sister your brother your parents or your friends. Take a personal day or take a long weekend off and just get it together. Sharing your personal life at work, unless it is something positive like getting married or having your first born child, will make you wish latter on that you just shut the hell up about everything.

Posting something stupid or mean on someones wall inadvertinly make you look like a stupid angry nut (SAT). Don’t be a stupid angry nut. Facebook or any public forum is not the place to air grievances, or to use profanity against another person in front of others. Facebook or any personal page is just that, personal. Like being invited into someones house, so should the same care be taken with someones page. Anyone of my readers who adds me as friend I accept, but that acceptance is like me inviting you over my house. A certain level of decorum is expected. When your feeling mad at someone and you want to get back at them or tell them how you feel, then go for it. Just don’t do it on yours or theirs Facebook wall. Keep it to the message feature, or better, calm down, think rationally, shut the hell up, and think about the consequences. When dealing with a jilted friend, lover, or colleague, it is best to be stern and strong, not petty and pathetic.

Master the art of Shut The Hell Up. Pick your fights intelligently. Avoid trapping yourself with your words. Stop embarrassing yourself.  Gain control over your actions so you proceed with decisiveness and skill. Not angry and impulsive. It is always better to say nothing, than to get mad and say something stupid you wish you could take back. Take a few hours to calm down and think about what you will say. Put yourself in different positions in your mind. Ask yourself, if I was in THAT situation, how would I behave? How should I behave? Preparing yourself before hand will help you a great deal. Subscribing to this site (rss, twitter) will also help you a great deal. Remember learning the art of shutting the hell up is not easy, but with practice you will become a master.

image © sonsational